Most of us think of stress and anxiety as problems of the mind, racing thoughts, tension, and overwhelm. But in truth, stress often begins in the body.

When the body senses threat, real or imagined, it activates a biological chain reaction that prepares us to fight, flee, or freeze. Over time, these stress responses can become habitual, keeping the nervous system on high alert and making it difficult to feel calm, connected, or in control.

Learning to regulate your nervous system is not about forcing yourself to “be calm.” It’s about understanding your body’s stress responses and giving it what it needs to return to safety.

Understanding the Polyvagal Theory

The Polyvagal Theory, developed by Dr Stephen Porges, offers a powerful way to understand why we feel safe and connected at times and shut down or anxious at others. It teaches us that our nervous system is constantly scanning the environment for cues of safety or threat, a subconscious process called neuroception.

At the centre of this system is the vagus nerve the body’s longest cranial nerve connecting the brain with the heart, lungs, and gut. It acts like an internal communication line, helping regulate your heartbeat, breath, digestion, and emotional responses.

When your ventral vagal system is active, you feel grounded, present, and open to connection; life flows with more ease.
When your sympathetic system takes over, your body prepares to fight or flee. Your heart races, your breath quickens, and your mind starts problem-solving to stay safe.
And when things feel too much, your dorsal vagal system may take over, leading to shutdown, numbness, or disconnection as a way to conserve energy.

These states aren’t “good” or “bad”, they’re adaptive responses designed to protect you. The key is learning to notice which state you’re in and how to gently guide yourself back toward safety.

The Science of Emotional Addiction

When stress becomes chronic, our body can become addicted to the chemical cocktail of cortisol and adrenaline. This “emotional addiction” means that even when life calms down, our body might unconsciously recreate stressful scenarios, because it has become used to those familiar, high-alert feelings.

The good news? You can rewire this pattern. Through awareness, breathwork, and body-based regulation, you can retrain your nervous system to feel safe in calm, stability, and joy, not just chaos. The Science Behind Why We Get Hooked on Feelings

The Vagus Nerve & Psoas

The vagus nerve and the psoas muscle are deeply intertwined with your emotional and physical wellbeing.

The psoas, often called “the muscle of the soul,” runs from the spine through the pelvis to the thighs. It tightens when we experience fear or stress, creating tension in the lower back, hips, and gut, areas also rich with vagal nerve connections.

When the psoas is chronically tight, it keeps the body in a subtle state of fight-or-flight. Releasing and lengthening it through breath, movement, and somatic awareness helps restore a sense of grounded safety.

The vagus nerve, often called the body’s built-in stress regulator, is the longest cranial nerve, connecting the brain to the heart, lungs, and digestive system. It plays a key role in activating the parasympathetic nervous system, the state of rest, repair, and relaxation. When the vagus nerve is toned and functioning well, it helps slow the heart rate, calm the breath, aid digestion, and bring the body back into balance after stress. However, chronic tension, trauma, or emotional overwhelm can disrupt vagal tone, leaving the nervous system stuck in fight, flight, or freeze. The Vagus Nerve - Your Body's Stress Management System

The Role of Fascia in Stress and Emotional Holding

Fascia is the body’s connective tissue, a continuous web that runs from head to toe, wrapping around every muscle, bone, organ, nerve, and blood vessel. It weaves through the body in three main layers, superficial, deep, and visceral, connecting the skin to the muscles and the muscles to the organs. This means that what happens in one part of the body (for example, tension in the jaw or hips) can ripple through the entire fascial network, influencing posture, movement, and even emotion.

When we experience stress, trauma, or emotional suppression, fascia can tighten and lose hydration, creating a sense of physical restriction and emotional holding. Over time, this “frozen” tissue can contribute to stiffness, fatigue, or a feeling of being disconnected from the body.

Because fascia runs through and around every part of us, working with it can have profound effects. Gentle somatic approaches, such as breathwork, mindful touch, stretching, and movement, help rehydrate and release these layers. As the fascia softens, it improves blood and lymph flow, releases stored tension, and communicates safety signals to the nervous system.

In this way, releasing the fascia isn’t just physical, it’s emotional. When the body’s connective tissue begins to flow again, so does our sense of vitality, ease, and inner connection.

Bottom-Up Healing

Traditional approaches to stress management often focus on the mind, reframing thoughts, applying logic, or using willpower to override anxiety. But when the nervous system is dysregulated, the body stays stuck in survival mode, no matter how much positive thinking we try. The body speaks its own language, through breath, movement, sensation, and emotion, and it must first feel safe before the mind can really relax.

Bottom-up healing works through the body to calm the mind. Using gentle, science-backed practices such as breathwork, vagus nerve toning, somatic release, somatic experiencing, psoas release, and Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), emotional digestion, and meditation, we begin to restore balance from the inside out. These practices help discharge stored stress and energy, regulate the nervous system, and send powerful signals of safety to the brain.

When the body feels grounded and safe, the mind can follow. Thoughts become clearer, emotions feel easier to process, and the sense of being “on edge” begins to dissolve. This is the essence of bottom-up healing by teaching the body how to feel safe again.